JUUL CEO: No More Advertising to Kids

JUUL CEO: No More Advertising to Kids

(fun music) – Hello America, I’m
Matt Stool, CEO of Juul, the makers of America’s
favorite electronic cigarettes. We have recently come under fire for our advertisements
targeting young children and as the face of this company, I just want to tell you, we are so sorry. We would never market to the developing brains
of America’s future. Because bottom line
that’s what children are. They’re our future. So as a special apology, we’d
like to issue all Juul users a free pack of our expanded flavors. That means you get cherry berry unicorn, blue raspberry rainbow, and Minecraft. (tongue clicking) Cut, cut cut cut. Minecraft? That’s a game. What the hell? What would Minecraft taste like? – [Cameraman] It taste earthy. – Oh (beep). I have never seen blue raspberry marketed to anyone over the age of 10. – [Cameraman] I like blue raspberry. – No you don’t. I think children barely
like blue raspberry. Oh boy. You gotta dump it. You gotta dump all of it. Yeah all my Juul stock. I don’t care partially vested is fine. We got maybe less than a week. (throat clearing) Hold on, sorry. We at Juul know that
adults love our product but don’t want the hassle of
keeping their e-cigarettes away from kids. Which is why Juul owners can now receive our special Juul carrying case. It’s got plenty of space
for you Juul device and up to four Juul pods
with enough room leftover for a sandwich and a milk carton. It’s a (beep) lunch box gang. Anyone disagree? – [Cameraman] It’s A Juul carrying case. – Yellow, red, pink, green, blue, black. Those are the exact colors
of the Power Rangers. We want adults to use this. What adult in their right mind is going to put their Juul pods in a brightly colored lunch
box next to a carton of milk? – [Cameraman] I use that for myself. – You use this as a Juul carrying case? – [Cameraman] Yeah. – Cool, show it to me. Show me yours, that you use. – [Cameraman] My kid took
it to school by accident. – Your child took it
to school by accident? What ever did he think it was? – [Cameraman] A lunch. – That’s what I’m (beep) talking about. The things got (beep) lunch. We’re also happy to
announce our first foray into long form content with
the release of our new show “Just Juul” about a hapless
guy who runs a Juul shop. Okay, that’s not actually that bad. So not only is this a children’s cartoon, but we are flagrantly ripping off Pokemon. That’s Pikachu. Squirtle, Bulbasaur, Charmander. And the exact font. That’s a child. – [Cameraman] Technically,
he’s 475 years old. – Then why did you draw him like this? Do you understand how (beep) we are? Pulling this (beep) with this government? We’d be all better off
committing war crimes than this level of copyright infringement. Why are they (beep) making bedroom eyes? If we (beep) with Pikachu it’s our (beep). Why only inhale Juuls when
you can wear Juul too? Check out our new line of backpacks and each one comes with
a free Juul device. This is a child’s backpack. – [Cameraman] That’s an adult backpack. – Look at me and say what you said. – [Cameraman] Adult backpack. – You’re never walking again. – [Cameraman] What are you doing? – Now for the advance Juul smoker, we want to introduce
our new Juul spinners. Now you can suspend up to five
different Juuls in mid-air so the flavor train never ends. This is for babies. I feel like the flavor
train might end, gang. When little kids get the
popcorn lung in their soft, little squishy lungs and their dad feel like that’s the last
stop on the flavor train. Honk honk. What happened to this country? They’re hard to get. Also make sure you check out
our first branded Juul book. Sleek black case? This is actually, this
is are actual brand guys. This is great, okay. Check our our first– – Save up your allowance for Juul pods. – We’re monsters. – Hey it’s Tao, if you like College Humor and want to support us,
sign up for dropout. For the low price of
a small bag of catnip, you’ll get videos like
this a whole week sooner, to chat with us live
in the dropout discord, and get exclusive content
like dimension 20. – There are no stupid Christians. – Are you my freaking dad? (laughing) – Sign up for your free
trial unless you hate fun. Which if you do, come
to my party on Saturday. It won’t be fun at all.

100 thoughts on “JUUL CEO: No More Advertising to Kids

  1. Brennan: With this government we would be better off committing war crimes!
    Me: Yea thats very funny, but clearly an exaggeration.
    Trump:* Literally forgives soldiers that were convicted of war crime*
    Me: Goddamn it.

  2. I think it's sad that I know what juuls look like even though I have never bought, used, or been around for long periods of time simply because of all the kids at my school who decide to turn ALL of our bathrooms into juul rooms.

  3. I was thinking "haha COPPA", but then I realized that THIS satirical video could potentially get auto marked by YouTube's terrible system as being "made for kids" because there are a ton of jokes in it, there are a lot of bright colors, and you say the word "kids" a lot, along with other words the system is looking for.

  4. this is such a good fucking series, and the fact that they wait and don’t do it is even better, it’s almost as if it’s a tactical move to wait for companies to be made fun of

  5. Until whipped cream flavored vodka and apple pie flavored moonshine are banned, saying that flavored vapes are inherently marketing to kids is asinine.

  6. I love the sneaky line, "we would never market the developing brains of America's future. Because bottom line, that's what children are : the're our future

  7. I wanna see an edition where the CEO of whatever DOES destroy all the product that is causing problems, he thinks everything's good now and then his company immediately files for bankruptcy because we are suicidal humans and we hate safe, wholesome, common sense things.

  8. it kinda makes sense.
    Sellers of exotic creatures are always ancient beings at least hundreds of years old.
    And if you've lived that long, you've probably stumbled across some form of youth elixir

  9. "Pulling this shit, with this government, we'd be all better off committing war crimes, then this level of copyright infringement" it sad because it's true, it's basically treated as a war crime

  10. As a vaper for 6 years now and a former smoker, juul is for dummies who don't know how to get a proper mod box. You could ban juul pods and all e cigs for all I care, just leave vaporizers alone there is a very big difference.

  11. You know this videos pretty funny, but what actual juul did by giving the government big baby eyes and saying “yeah, we’ll just take flavors out off the market from our brand :-)” they blatantly ignored that kids are getting hooked because they introduced 50mg nicotine per ml of juice, and not because of flavors. Kids stuck with juul, and now they just use tobacco and menthol flavors.

  12. Vape: let’s help stop smo-
    Kids: wait so we can look co-
    Vape: make sure to not let kid-
    Kids: BuBblE GuM
    Juul: also Minecraft
    Legit all other vape: but it shouldn’t be-

  13. This video would have been better without all the over explaining, a facepalm is sometimes enough, you don't need to tell me it's for babies when it's already way too obvious

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