Hey, Russia, Keep Your Crab Claws Off Our Internet

Hey, Russia, Keep Your Crab Claws Off Our Internet

WHEN I WAS GROWING UP, WE WERE IN A COLD WAR WITH RUSSIA. ANY MOMENT, ANY FALSE MOVE COULD MEAN TOTAL THERMONUCLEAR ARMAGEDDON, THE SURFACE OF THE EARTH TURNED INTO A GLOWIN ARBTRAY, ALL LIFE SNUFFED OUT, IS WHAT I TOLD THE GIRLD WHO WOULDN’T DATE ME. AND YET, THERE WAS NO WARMING OF RELATIONS. […]

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Katy Perry Carpool Karaoke

Katy Perry Carpool Karaoke

>>James: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HELPING ME GET TO WORK. HONESTLY, THE TRAFFIC HAS BEEN TERRIBLE. I REALLY APPRECIATE IT.>>I DIDN’T KNOW I WAS >>James: WELL, THAT IS A RELIEF. WHAT ARE THE CHANCES?>>I’M ON A BUDGET RIGHT NOW.>>James: GREAT, YOU’RE ON THE UBER POOL.>>I’M ON THE UBER POOL.>>James: WOULD IT BE GREAT IF […]

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Ellen Has a Big Surprise for Viral McDonald’s Pranksters

Ellen Has a Big Surprise for Viral McDonald’s Pranksters

If you watch my show, you know that I love pranks. I like scaring people, and I like making celebrities wear an ear piece. And I tell them to say things. And they can only do whatever I tell them to do. I love hiding Andy’s phone and watching him have a panic attack. And […]

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